Life...Which Way?

A common 4 letter word, often misunderstood. Sort of like love, but this is by far more complicated. I am learning to live my life in a way that I never did before. I guess you can call me a control-freak. I like to be able to manage things, direct, lead, guide and control. That's the teacher in me. It wasn't until this control thing, started to weigh in on my life and cause me to be in places I do not want to be. Trying to have control over others---->WHEW! Mission Impossible. I can't control the way one feels,  thinks, or even acts toward me. Yet, I tried,  I tried to control the very people in my life that I love, wanting them to do things my way and no other way. Who did I think I was? I tried to control my destiny, moving without praying, making decisons without consulting God, praying and then still trying to "work it out" on my own. And again I ask, who did I think I was?

It was a day when I felt as if I was losing all I had worked to so hard to attain, that God caught my attention. He spoke to clear to me and said, I am God. I know who God is but I wasn't acting like it. I was doing things, my way, and wanting things to be MY WAY with no respect for God's way. Which indeed is the ONLY WAY that is right.

My close friends call me spoiled, my Mommy calls me a brat, both of my Grandma's give me what I want, but there is no excuse for that kind of behavior anymore. I am not a little girl, though at times I would love to be. I have stop trying to control what God has placed in front of me. He did not bless me to take control, but to depend on him to live. He did not give me what I asked for me ruin it.

It was a lesson learned, through loving someone that God truly sent my way. I thank God for each lesson learned and giving me a brand new day. To live again, love again and have peace of mind on Earth. I broke the chain, I gave it up, being in control is a curse. It only sets you up to fail because perfect is what I am not. I gave it to Jesus, to control for me, because is the BEST I HAVE GOT <3